My last days in Phnom Penh were memorable yet depressing. Saying goodbye to the children was very difficult. I felt little comfort in the fact that they were either too young or too disabled to understand my leaving. After six weeks, I felt as though I began to earn their trust. The kids knew what to expect from me and I knew what to expect from them. Six weeks may not be a lengthy time but I had fallen head over heals for each child. Now, all I can think about is how to go back. How can I keep helping them? I gave them all of me but then I left so suddenly. It isn't fair to the children but I hope my love and care will last in their hearts.
Friday night before leaving, Stephan, Nuno, Emily and I went to the mall. We ate fast food then watched a movie. We ordered too much popcorn and ate it loudly during "Battleship." The movie was exactly what we had expected it to be. Good, American, Corny Action. When we got home, I went up to my warm room and repacked my suitcase. My mind was going a mile a minute and I could barely focus on my simple task of folding clothes. I couldn't believe how quickly six weeks had passed and I truly did not want to leave. After packing, I took a long cool shower then slipped into pajamas. I tried blogging but my fingers were stiff and my mind was scrambled. I fell asleep and I awoke too soon.
Lugging my million pound suitcase down 3 flights of stairs was no easy task. Thank goodness for my manly shoulders and brute strength. I ate a peanut butter and nutella sandwich and drank a large glass of water. Emily came down stairs and I gave her a few beauty supplies that I was leaving behind. I followed her to her room and hung out on the empty bed while she packed for Thailand. We chatted until the power went out then quickly went downstairs before it got too hot. Nuno, Stephan and Gabriel were waiting at the table. Everyone was pretty quiet apparently tired.
I gave a bottle of wine to the host family and staff along with a thank you note. They gave me a small box with a gift. (later opened it in the airport to find some fancy Cambodian nail clippers inside). Oh Cambodia. I had stalled enough and it was finally time for me to leave. I held back tears and hugged everyone goodbye. My tuk tuk driver loaded my suitcase and I was off. By the time I reached the end of the street, the tears were flowing freely. I wished for an incredibly long tuk tuk ride to the airport. It wasn't quick but it wasn't long enough either. I wanted to hold my babies one last time. I wanted to cuddle with Sam Nang, practice colors with Van Hon or say the alphabet with Keo. I arrived at the airport and before I knew it, I was boarding the plane.
After a long day of flying, I slowly made my way through SFO customs and then received my luggage. I walked the long hallway and as I turned the corner I spotted my mom and granny. Ahh, I was finally back in the states and I couldn't wait to see my animals. We met Lance for dinner and then headed home. I greeted my dog, my cats, and chubby rats. I took a warm shower and crawled into bed. I closed my eyes and hoped I would wake up from the dream. I wanted to be home... in Phnom Penh, Cambodia.
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